Thursday, September 1, 2011

Pick Your Own Ending.

"Choose a job you love, and you will never work have to work a day in your life"

Good quote, right? I think so. I really like my job. I think I say that in about every other blog post, ha. Funny because I remember talking about how I completely didn't want this job. There's two ways I can take this blog post from here, and I don't know which is the better option so I'll go with both.

A) What I love about this job is knowing that everyday I have people depending on me. I really like that feeling, because I feel like it gives me a purpose. I like knowing that these people actually need me, and that I have the power to make their day. Yes, I know people depended on me at my other jobs that I've worked at, and I really enjoyed them too. But at this job everything just fits well. At a previous job I was criticized for my personality, for being too nice. Ok, so maybe you can't be all sweet and caring when you work with teenage criminals, but I'm not very good at the whole being tough thing. At my second job, I loved my co-workers and the individuals I worked with, but they were so short staffed that I never had time to really enjoy what I was doing or just bond with my assigned individuals for that day as much as I would have liked. At my most recent previous job the pay sucked, the other employees sucked (showing up an hour and a half late to your shift was deemed "normal"), and the individuals weren't as interested in having a relationship with the workers. But this job? My co-workers are awesome. Yeah, I won't lie, there's some drama, but for the most part I'm doing a pretty good job of staying out of it (I'm over getting involved with co-workers drama, thanks to past experiences in Cedar Rapids). The pay isn't the best, but the best I've had out of all my previous jobs. The hours rock, even if they did take me awhile to get used to. Then, there's the individuals. I get along great with so many of them, and they are hilarious! I come home with so many funny stories everyday about things that have happened. I have them all calling me "Ella" because it's shorter and easier to remember than Joella. There's one in particular who calls me "Eva" though, lol. I really want to become an RN. However, stupid FAFSA is being a bitch and won't help me out. So I guess I better start trying to find something with my Psychology degree. I just hope I'll always enjoy a job as much as I enjoy this one.

The other way I could have gone with this post goes like this:

B) Good quote, right? I think so. I really like my job. I think I say that in about every other blog post, ha. Funny because I remember talking about how I completely didn't want this job.Isn't it funny how life always seems to turn out so unexpected. Things always pop up when you least expect it. Just when you think you have something figured out life has to laugh at you and say "oh, young grasshopper, you have so much to learn" and forces a life lesson on you. I was dead set against that job. I didn't want it. I was over direct care, I wanted a desk job, I was certain everybody there was going to be rude and snotty. Boy was I wrong. I love doing direct care. Why would I want to sit at a desk all day and watch the time tick by? The people are so far from being snotty and instead everybody is greeted every morning with Burger King, chocolates, and / or smiles. I thought I had my life figured out in Florida too, living the dream. I was with this guy I was heals over head for, in my dream state, picking out engagement rings and baby names. Four years of my life lost in an instant, literally. Now I'm here in this place that I never dreamed of being. So I've given up on trying in life anymore. And not in an emo depressed I hate my life type way, but in a general sense. Do I want to live in Florida again? Yes. But if something or someone comes along and moves me to...ohhhh I don't know...Montana, I'm not going to say no because I may turn out to love it. My goal of being married by 24 and my first kid by 25? Yeah, that'd be nice, but if I were to keep that goal I may end up settling for anybody just because I'm 23 and the clock is ticking down because I'm almost 24. That's an equation for disaster. And what's wrong with having children when I'm older? Then I could (hopefully) have a house bought, a husband who loves me, savings started, a good career, and be in a good place in my life. Basically I'm learning to go with my life instead of trying to force it down a certain road. I guess when that lesson is forced down your throat so many times, you'll eventually learn the lesson no matter how hard to try to deny it.

So that's where I am right now. I'm glad I picked "The Next Chapter" as my blog's title. Yes, it's completely different now than what I expected it to be about when I started it...but hey, that was the point of today's blog. This isn't a Disney movie, this isn't a trashy romantic novel where everything is going to work itself out. This is a real life, and it's mine. Yeah, sometimes it makes for boing blog posts, but I sure want to start making the most of it. Maybe soon I'll make a post about all the things I want to do. Maybe I'll be brave and try sky diving or even *gasp* COOKING! :)

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