Sunday, December 18, 2011

Watch Out For Those Silver Civics!!

It's difficult for me to type right this moment. Madison felt the need to sit on my lap and when I tried to pick her up off of me she growled. Sooo, here she sits. She's the boss afterall. She's been mad at me ever since I gave her a bath last week, and as a punishment she has taken a shit on my new rug, dumped over my bathroom's trashcan, and ate my stash of candy corns then threw up right outside my bedroom door. Gotta love Maddie and I's love/hate relationship.

Last night Nick and I went and had some IHOP for supper. Nick was still hungover for a Christmas party the night before. I know, what a champ right? Anyways, everybody knows the best thing for a hangover is McDonalds breakfast hashbrowns, but like I said it was for supper and McDonalds doesn't serve breakfast at that time. Although, if they did I'm sure they'd make lots of money. So then afterwards we drove around and looked at all the Christmas lights downtown. This city does a beautiful job decorating for the holidays. The skywalks are all outlined in red lights, the trees that line the sidewalks are all alternating with either blue or green lights. Instead of having regular lights to light up the buildings they had blue. They were just really pretty, especially when you got to the top and could just look over the beautifully lit city. This was a nice little bonding adventure for Nick and I. Except for the fact that him and I had had a  water drinking contest at supper and my bladder was getting pretty full. Luckily we live pretty close to downtown so the ride home shouldn't take long. Key word there: sholdn't. Downtown streets get pretty messed up with the one ways and all the streets that for no reason other than to confuse you don't run parallel and twist and turn and meet in random places. There's this one random street that we take to get home from downtown (which has the best bars, btw)  that merges onto another street, like you would merge onto an interstate. Only it's not an interstate, but that's not really important. Anyways, traffic is stopped. On the three lane. Making merging impossible. Making it more impossible is that the cars were bumper to bumper and refusing to make any sort of gap so we could get in. I kid you not we sat in the same spot for 10 minutes waiting for the 4th car in front of us to be able to get in. NOBODY was letting us in. That car kept creeping into that lane and the fuckers WENT.AROUND.HIM still bumper to bumper. Because heaven forbid they let one car in front of them. They may get to their destination a minute or two later! OH NO! This was not good for my bladder which was starting to burn I had to go soooo bad. So I did what any woman who was about to explode would do. I laid on my horn. Wrong thing to do. The bitch in front of me in a silver civic puts half of her body out her window, literally, half her body and starts screaming and flipping me off.  Not just a simple "fuck off" and a flip of the bird. Nope. With all the flailing of her arms and the intensity of her screaming it almost seemed as if she was getting hardcore into a good song or something. She just kept on going.

"Why the hell would I honk at you? You can't fucking go anywhere! I'm honking at all the douches who won't let us in!!" 

But she was too busy yelling at me/jamming out to god knows what to understand . After my little honking fit we continued to sit there for another good 5 minutes, and by that time we only had 3 more cars in front of us! So that first car had pushed his way in far enough that they couldn't get around him anymore. 

I don't know what I did at that point but the bitch got out of her car and started yelling at me and flipping me off AGAIN! I told Nick I should just go piss on her. Psycho bitch.

Sorry for all the cursing, it was a very angry time in my day. IHOP however was delicious, and yes I won the water drinking contest.





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